When your surrogate finally gives birth to a healthy baby girl or boy, you’ll want to shout the news from the rooftops. With baby announcements already drawn up and birth and newborn photos already taken, you’re ready to send those papers out to family, friends and even the slightest of acquaintances.
But hold on one second — announcements of children born via surrogacy deserve a little extra attention. While surrogacy doesn’t make you any less of a parent than if you had carried your baby yourself, it is a special process that you should celebrate in your announcements. But how?
You may have never seen a baby-born-via-surrogacy announcement. Knowing what to and what not to include can be confusing.
Don’t worry — American Surrogacy is here to help. Below, find a few tips we offer intended parents when it’s time to announce their baby’s arrival into the world.
Tip #1: First, Decide When You’ll Send an Announcement
Before we get into the details of sending baby announcements, we know that you might be interested in sending surrogacy and pregnancy announcements, as well. Ultimately, it will be up to you and your spouse to decide what time is best to announce your new addition — but there are a few things to consider.
Many parents are so excited to finally begin their surrogacy journey that they announce their news right at the start. Or, they may be so thrilled at their surrogate’s positive pregnancy test that they can’t keep their news to themselves. It’s totally understandable to want to share your surrogacy journey with the world, but we encourage intended parents to be patient.
If you want to send a pre-birth announcement, doctors often recommend waiting until 12 weeks of pregnancy. At that point, the risks of miscarriage decrease greatly, and there is a higher chance that your surrogate will deliver a healthy, happy baby.
Because of the potential risks of surrogacy, many intended parents wait until their baby is born to share their parenthood news with the world. While we encourage intended parents to tell their close family and friends about their journey early on, it might be best to wait until your little one is home before telling every person in your network.
But, again, this decision is always up to you.
Tip #2: Don’t Forget to Honor Your Gestational Carrier
You know birth announcements typically include a cute photo and the birth details. But, when your child is born via surrogacy, don’t forget one important detail: your gestational carrier.
Your surrogate will have sacrificed a great deal of time and energy to help you become a parent. And, while she will be fairly compensated and receive a great deal of satisfaction in her choice, you should also honor that journey.
How exactly you do this is up to you. But a simple line like “Thank you to our gestational carrier Sarah for bringing our little joy into the world!” can recognize her unique role and show your appreciation.
Tip #3: But Don’t Overshare Info
Remember that your surrogate is her own person — and she has the right to tell her surrogacy story in her own way and on her own time. Don’t use your birth announcement to describe every step of your surrogacy journey (unless you’ve cleared it with her ahead of time). Details like the surrogate’s last name, location, age and family members should stay off the announcement. A simple shout-out will be enough.
Remember: If you post your birth announcement to social media, it can easily be seen by those not in your network, even with privacy settings.
Tip #4: Look to Other Examples for Ideas
While surrogacy is becoming more common, you may not have anyone in your community who has gone through this process. If you’ve never seen a surrogacy birth announcement, how do you know what yours should look like?
The good news is that you can use templates from traditional birth announcements for your surrogacy birth announcements. You may need to tweak a few details, but most of the basics will remain the same.
Tip #5: Do What’s Right for You
Like most aspects of your surrogacy journey, there is no “right” or “wrong” way to announce your baby’s birth. If you’re a more private person, you may not send an announcement at all. Maybe you keep your announcements to a smaller group of people and don’t even mention your surrogate on them — because, by then, your gestational surrogacy is common knowledge.
Every one of these options (and the many more available to you) are perfectly okay. Gestational surrogacy is a long journey, and you’ll have to make a lot of compromises along the way. If you want to do birth announcements completely your way, that’s totally understandable.
If you ever need guidance on when and how to announce your gestational surrogacy journey, don’t be afraid to reach out to your American Surrogacy specialist anytime.