The Pros and Cons of Surrogate Support Groups

Surrogate support groups are all over the internet — but what should you know before joining? Learn more about these support groups here to help you locate the one that is best for you.

When a prospective surrogate like you goes about making her surrogacy support system, she often automatically thinks about close family and friends (not to mention her surrogacy professionals) to include. However, your surrogacy support system doesn’t have to be all people that you know. Just as the internet likely assisted you through your surrogacy research process, it can also be a benefit as you walk through your surrogacy journey.

Surrogacy is a family-building process worldwide, and people don’t just connect through agencies. If you are feeling alone in your surrogacy journey, you may consider joining some surrogacy support groups with other women like you.

Online and in-person surrogate support groups can serve as both positive and negative forces in a woman’s surrogacy journey. Therefore, our specialists at American Surrogacy encourage you to be fully informed before joining these groups. Remember, we are always here to answer your questions and ensure you understand the surrogacy process 100 percent from an educated, unbiased standpoint. For more information, please reach out to our agency at 1-800-875-BABY(2229).

Many of our surrogates join surrogate support groups — and we recognize the usefulness of connecting with other gestational carriers! However, there are a few things we’d like you to know before signing on.

Pros of Joining a Surrogate Support Group

Being a gestational carrier is still a novel journey for many women, which often means they have never met or talked to another surrogate before. By joining a surrogate support group, a prospective surrogate can learn more about what it’s really like to take this journey from those who have actually been there.

Surrogacy support groups exist both in-person and online, but the latter is far more popular for gestational carriers to connect. In these online groups, surrogates from across the country (and across the world) share their stories and experiences with each other. It’s also a great place for you to ask any questions you have about becoming a surrogate to ensure it is the right path for you.

Once you have begun your surrogacy journey, you can use these groups to share your own experiences, as well. The women in these groups will share your excitement for your surrogacy process and be there to support you in a knowledgeable way that others may not.

Another advantage of these groups is the potential connection they create with intended parents. While American Surrogacy will always provide free matching services to prospective surrogates, we understand that some women are interested in finding intended parents on their own. You can use these groups to connect with hopeful parents across the country, and you can always contact our agency after for guidance through the rest of your surrogacy journey.

Cons of Joining a Surrogate Support Group

However, as beneficial as these support groups can be, they must also be taken with a grain of salt. In most of these groups (especially those you find online), anyone can join — which means you will have people will all degrees of experience sharing their opinions and information. Not all of this information will be helpful or even entirely accurate, so it’s important that you always talk to a surrogacy professional like an agency, lawyer or clinic for the best answers to questions about your situation.

In addition, because anyone can join these groups, you’ll need to enter them knowing there will be differing opinions. Surrogacy is still misunderstood; you may see comments and conversations trying to sway you away from your personal surrogacy decisions to what someone else thinks is best. Remember, you are the only one who can decide what kind of surrogacy journey is best for you, and you shouldn’t let others dictate your decisions for you. 

On the same note, just as controversial surrogacy stories get the most attention from media around the world, you may find that you see more negative stories than good ones in these groups. This is not a true representation of surrogacy. You may need to dig around for other groups to find those that are more positive and provide the support you need during this journey.

Remember, should you ever wish to connect to another gestational carrier in person, your surrogacy specialist can work to find a former or current carrier with our agency to answer your questions and share her experience.

10 Surrogate Online Resources to Consider

If you’re looking for surrogate support groups, you have a few places to start. As mentioned, your surrogacy specialist can help you connect with our agency’s surrogates. You can also search through organizations like All Things Surrogacy, and the National Infertility Association to find in-person support groups close to you.

To find more “cycle buddies,” or women who are going through the process at the same time as you, you might also consider looking through these online support groups:

  1. All About Surrogacy’s forum, articles and classifieds
  2. Surrogate Mothers Online message boards, articles and classifieds
  3. Surrogate Mothers Facebook Group
  4. All Things Surrogacy Facebook Group
  5. Gestational and Traditional Surrogacy Support Group
  6. Intended Parents & Surrogates & Egg Donors (Helping People Meet)
  7. Surrogacy Support Group
  8. Find Surrogacy Mother
  9. Surrogate/IP Meeting Place Facebook Group
  10. Surrogate and & IPs Match/Chat Facebook Group

Want to learn more about finding a surrogate support group that is right for you? Speak to a surrogacy specialist for more information and to start your surrogacy journey today.